Hollywood Undead-Swan Songs

Hollywood Undead Swan Songs:

Do you remember Limp Bizkit? What about Slipknot? And Eminem? I do to, and I sympathize. Popular music in the late nineties sucked. It empirically sucked. This isn’t an issue of the subjectivity of musical taste, this music objectively fucking sucks. However, none of this music compares to the new high bastion of suck Hollywood Undead.

Imagine multiple Fred Dursts dressed up in masks saying the word fuck a lot and calling out emo kids over a carbon copy of the riff from Crazy Train. Yes, its that bad. Oh and lets not forget the shameful mix of crunk production, distorted guitars, and club vocals that make up No.5, one of their most well known songs. These violent sexist assholes got popular via their Myspace account, and were the first band signed to Myspace’s record label. Their music can currently be found in popular video games and big-budget movies.  Not too mention their 2008 single undead reached 10 on the on Billboards Hot Mainstream Rock Charts.

Didn’t our overexposure to Nu-Metal teach us anything? Don’t you remember the sigh of relief America as whole sounded, when that trend ended? Isn’t there a warning explicitly about this band in the Book of Revelation? Isn’t there enough good angry music out there, to stop shit like this from getting passed the 5th play on Myspace? I guess not, but we can fight back. If your child or friend enjoys this band, please do everything you can to save them. Tie them to a chair, and go Clockwork Orange on their ass. Super glue an I-pod to their person, containing TV on The Radio’s complete discography.  Anything! Do anything you possibly can to prevent this garbage from getting any popular than it already has. Its your duty as upholders of culture and taste. Go forth and fight the good fight

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